Thoughts on The White Sox and Manny Machado by an Angry Black Sox Fan.

As of 12:07 PM CST, we are officially just over 24 hours since Manny Machado accepted $300 Million in guaranteed money from the San Diego Padres. Outside of actual Baseball-related defeats, this is the biggest disappointment in my 35 years as a Sox fan. Yes, bigger than the White Flag Trade of ’97 and that time Drake LaRoche destroyed the clubhouse chemistry. (I wonder how he’s doing…)

Anyway, I spent the good part of yesterday furiously tweeting my rage and anger at anyone that was willing to listen. It was obscene, really. Rick Hahn, Kenny Williams, Jerry Reinsdorf, various deities, Ben Shapiro (yes, evidently ol Ben is a White Sox fan), anyone and everyone who had a hand in this colossal failure got a piece of my mind.

Think about it.

The White Sox, unable to even get above .500 with Chris Sale, Jose Quintana, Adam Eaton, decided to give away 2 whole seasons (2016-2017), sell off anybody with a pulse and some trade value, pare down the payroll to the point that literally there was only Tim Anderson slated to make real money, all in the hopes to be in the position in 2019 to take on Manny Machado or Bryce Harper.

And then the time came. Manny strikes out to end the World Series and the White Sox were on the clock to do the damn thing and pay [clap] the [Clap] man! [THUNDER CLAP]. And the Usual Suspects were expected to do their thing and back up the truck for Manny…. but hold up! What’s this?

  • The Dodgers have 17 outfielders and will pay a big ass tax to take on Manny? PASS.
  • The Yankees, Manny’s childhood favorite team, say “Heavens, No! We’re the Yankees! We are known for our Fiscal Responsibility!” PASS.
  • Nearly Every other MLB team that without a doubt could pay Manny what he wants. PASS PASS PASS.

and so it came to pass [heh heh]: The White Sox had virtually zero competition and could moonwalk the contract over to Manny’s agent and the rest would be White Sox History….


Then the rumors start trickling in.

Padres GM flies to meet Manny… SD offer is substantially better…

No. This can’t be. We were explicitly told there were no financial restrictions on this pursuit. It’s not exactly saying they’ll spend “Stupid Money”, but I would think this means “oh that’s cute, $300 Mil from San Diego? BAM! $300,000,001!” [cue Price is Right winner music]

And then the MLB At Bat notification pops down from the top of my phone. After about 2.7 seconds in the Denial stage, I hit the Anger stage HARD. [refer to my TL @Leonard42]. Bargaining and Depression will come eventually. Then Acceptance will settle in as I am rapidly coming to the realization that the Sox sold us a bunch of bullshit for 2 years, then decided to Gator-arm and lose the ability to find their checkbook when the bill came due.

The story of what Manny Machado wanted was very simple. $300 million. Write the check and he’s wearing Black and White for a decade. But what do these cheapskates do?

They said no.

Take $250. Take 2 less years. Stay for all 8 years. At the end of that time, when you are 34, if you can make 550 plate appearances you will get another $50 million for two years (oh and don’t worry about inflation, that math would be too difficult). If not, good luck as a 34 year old shortstop with 2 prior knee surgeries recouping that lost income.

That’s what Rick Hahn means when he says “creative” “potentially more lucrative” “better offer”. He knew he had to find some way of gaslighting me and all Sox fans that spent the last 3 months waiting for a reward they knew wouldn’t come. How dare they? Wimpy offered a better deal when he said he’d pay me Tuesday for a hamburger today! AND THAT BASTARD STILL HASNT PAID ME BACK!

but I digress.

So after all this, what’s next? Well Bryce will be a Not White Sox. Nolan Arenado and every FA now know this organization needs #ThoughtsAndPrayers to make up for their deficient offers. And Jerry Reinsdorf has $250-350 million more dollars to bury with him. And I’ll still root for the team goddammit. I’ll still root for Eloy (and fuck me if they don’t pay him in 7 years…), I’ll hope and pray the other prospects all pan out and stop blowing out ACLs and Elbow ligaments (oh wasn’t the Basabe hand breaking just the cherry on the sundae?). And I hope to take my son to his first Sox game this season. That’s all the hope I got tho.

Not even a patented Yolmer Gatorade shower will make this pain go away.

See y’all next time.

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Time(less) is a flat circle

Not again.

Goddammit, NBC did it to me again.

For the 2nd time, Timeless has been cancelled by the Peacock Network and…its more heartbreaking than the first axing. The time-travel drama that had a rag-tag team of good guys fighting to save history from a centuries old organization hell bent on shaping reality by kicking up the past was more than just a regular sci-fi show.

Timeless taught us history dammit. And not just a rehashing of well known figures and events. It brought to light many of the untold stories behind what made them outwardly significant. Like did you know the man who inspired the Lone Ranger was Black? Or Citizen Kane quite possibly prevented a stranglehold on independent news? Or how Hollywood Star Hedy Lamaar was a Freaking Scientist and Inventor? Yeah, that’s the stuff Timeless gave to us. And NBC couldn’t find a way.

And my man Rufus. Fuck… I knew this show was going to be my shit after his rant at a racist white cop basically telling him that he’s in for a rude awakening at the prolific rise of African Americans and their culture in the upcoming decades. As Rufus expertly said, “Pretty much any black dude named Michael…” And now he is dead (sorry, spoilers but honestly what’s the point if this is actually the end) and Future Wyatt and Lucy have comeback just in time for Lucy (mixed metaphor confusion alert!) to pull the football away from Charlie Brown.

Now NBC allegedly will try to give Timeless a 2 hour movie to wrap things up but that prospect is hit (hooray for Sense8) and miss (Deadwood still ain’t happening). Honestly, fine. I’d take it. But fuck me, it’ll be really tough to enjoy it. But Brooklyn Nine-Nine got a second chance (glad you found space for them NBC). Lucifer made a deal with the… we’ll never mind and got a new life. And Roseanne dressed up as a literal Nazi and called a black woman an ape and ABC moved heaven and earth (and Roseanne) to bring back a show nobody asked for in the first place!

So to wrap this all up. I fully understand that being this affected by a fictional tv show is silly in the light of the truly awful reality this country (and planet) is dealing with thanks to you know who. But shit, Timeless was a bit of light and goodness that I could hold onto if only for an hour a week (oh and don’t think I will forgive NBC for putting the show on Sunday (ok) at 10pm Eastern (wtf) so families had to decide whether watching Timeless was worth less sleep before work or school That was a real dick move.)

I hope that a miracle happens and a full season 3 is ordered on Netflix/Hulu/Amazon/SyFy. Even if they say yes but we aren’t doing any seasons after that I’d be on board. But this was not how a how should be treated. With a Friday Bad News Dump and another season of Chicago Santiation/Deli/Etc Show.


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Holy Crap, Is This Thing Still On?

Yes, it’s me.  I need to decide on what the hell I want to write about.  I’m pretty bad at keeping up on things it turns out.  In fact, I think I would like to write more… it’s just you know… Wait… you don’t care why I haven’t written do you?  Either I want to do it or I don’t.  My silence for the past 65 weeks* is a pretty big indicator of my interest no?

*low estimate*

So if anyone is out there, just toss something out.  Literally anything.  I will write something about it.

I dare you.


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And now for your Near-Annual Post from Yours Truly!

Oh man…. what a year!  It’s only been 51 weeks (!!!) since my last post and you know I have like 20,000 words ready to spill onto the page, going into minute detail on all of the living I’ve been doing here on this planet.

So lets start where I left off…

  • I can guarantee you, dear reader, if the Cubbies had actually pulled off a repeat of last year’s nightmarish championship… I would not have written such a thoughtful praising of that accomplishment.  Thank goodness that was the only near miss of a potential apocalyptic disaster we as a society had to face in 2017!
  • The Bears only won three games last year and lo and behold in just 7 games they have already reached that total! Hell, they might even have a couple more if Mike Glennon and his giraffe neck didn’t stink up the field.  I’m just so glad the defense is actually making opposing offenses scared while covering for the fact that our rookie QB (MMMMMIIIIIIIITTTTTCCHHHHHH!!) only throws the ball 2 to 7 times a game.
  • The Sox went ahead and decided to follow my first plan of action and sold off every player on the team worth a damn…. and got themselves a HELL of a return in prospects… Chris Sale (Moncada/Kopech)… Adam Eaton (Giolito/Lopez/Dunning)… and maybe the best of them all Jose Quintana (Eloy “The Bess” Jiminez and Dylan Cease) all got shipped out of town (well, not Jose… he moved 8 miles north…)  And the Sox became the most fun 65 win team to watch in my lifetime.  Probably more losing to come, but they are not going to be down for much longer!
  • The Bulls got in the playoffs somehow, lost, trades Jimmy Butler for a bag of magic beans and a player to be named later, then just before the new season started one of their bad players punched another bad player in the face and broke his jaw. In practice. So… yeah, moving on.
  • And the Blackhawks got swept in the first round and I really… didn’t… care.  Sorry, I’m an unabashed bandwagon Hawks fan. I slept like a baby when they were eliminated and I’ll check back in a few weeks before the playoffs start.

So that’s all for the Sports portion of my return to WordPress and if I don’t see you for another 12 months or so… it certainly won’t be for a lack of trying!  It will likely be the lack of a serviceable power grid after North Korean nukes destroy America!

Good Night!

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The late, great Harvey Dent once said:  “You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.”

Powerful words from a man who would become the perfect Phantom of The Opera cosplayer soon after.  But to continue my expulsion of emotions from the aftermath of the Cubs becoming a bonafide champion, I recently came across an article that perfectly explains the two paths the organization can take going forward. 

Over on Deadspin, there’s a great piece written by Hamilton Nolan titled, “Congratulations Chicago. Now Get Over It.”

It boils down to the Cubs fans either taking the High Road, Yankee-like, We-Expect-To-Win-Every-Season-So-What approach… or becoming insufferable Red Sox Massholes imbued with the false bravado that comes with ending a ridiculously long Championship drought and acting like the awful years never happened. 

If anything good that might come out of this unpleasant reality I’m about to spend my winter suffering thru, it’s that the Cubs choose the former route.  Taking this dynasty seriously, focusing on crushing their competition like they are mere gnats buzzing too close to their ears is a path I can respect.  It’s boring as hell, just ask the San Antonio Spurs, but this season is put on the shelf, never to be fawned over the following season. 

Dear God, what have I done?  The Cubs have won a World Series and all I can do is write about it.  Fuck. Ok. Next post will be about something completely different.  Anyone got a topic to let me babble on for a few hundred words?  Leave a comment! 

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Worst Case Scenario: A White Sox Fan’s Thoughts on a Cubs Championship


Well Thank God That’s Over…

Let’s get this part out of the way:  The Chicago Cubs were legitimately the best baseball team in the Major Leagues this season.  They deserved this outcome based purely on every objective analysis of their organization.  The Front Office (Theo “F-You” Esptein, et. al.), the Manager (Joe “He’s been into Wilco way before they got famous” Maddon), and the players (guess what… being god awful for 3 years can pay off if you actually have competent people running the ship; see previous 2 mentions) all came together and steamrolled the entire league, making this postseason run a foregone conclusion since May.

That being said:  This is one of the best (yes, more on that in a bit) and the absolute worst case scenario as a fan of my team, the Chicago White Sox.


He’s the hero Sox Nation deserves…


First with the Bad.  11 Years ago, a most wonderful thing happened:  The Chicago White Sox went and won their first World Series title in 88 years.  And despite what a depressing number of media outlets failed to mention, it really did happen and there’s no givesies-backsies.  Anyway, I digress.  So the Sox have their moment in the sun, things are super duper, and then…

…that’s it.  See, the White Sox went ahead and had a decent follow up 2006 season winning 90 games.  Unfortunately, 2 more teams in the division ended up with more and the Sox lost their chance to repeat.  And that was the end of the Sox brief run as Kings of Chicago Baseball.  At the same time, a little known franchise that played baseball 8 miles north of Comiskey (still the name dammit) named the Chicago Cubs went on a run of mini-success.  The 2007 the Cubs eked out a Division Championship (later on getting swept in the first round).  The 2008 Cubs dominated the National League, got the best record…and again got swept out of the playoffs in the 1st round.  (full disclosure:  This writer was employed by the Chicago Cubs for these seasons.  I took their money in exchange for providing services and got access to lots of great behind the scenes stuff, like peeing in a stall next to Tim Robbins, who I assume was doing the same thing.)

And what were the White Sox doing then you ask?  Well 2007 the team cratered to a 72 win record.  2008, they made a small amount of history having to win 3 straight games against 3 different teams (the last one a tiebreaker won by a Solo Homer by Jim Thome) to make the playoffs…only to lose to Joe Maddon’s (heh) Tampa Rays.

From 2009 on, the White Sox have reverted back to their mid-1990s ways.  Being consistently mediocre and occasionally awful.  What made this period (still ongoing by the way) so intolerable is that the Sox have actively tried to build a winner through free agency and trades.  Suffice it to say, that plan has not worked.  2012 was probably the most agonizing season as the Sox were in first place for the entire season up until the last 2 weeks where a tailspin of a losing streak sent them home in Robin Ventura’s first season as manager.  There’s plenty of awful here too.  That 72 win team fortunately got the Sox their current ace and uniform slasher Chris Sale.  A turd-filled 63 win season netted top pitching prospect Carlos Rodon.  But for the most part, it’s been washed up all-stars (Manny Ramirez, Ken Griffey Jr, Adam Dunn, Adam LaRoche, etc.) steering this leaky ship towards the Bermuda Triangle of irrelevance.

The Cubs, however decided that enough was enough.  The 2008 team, while dominant, was made up of mostly older veterans, guys who were decent players but all on the back 9 holes of their careers.  So when Theo Epstein, former GM of the Boston Red Sox came available, the team wasted no time throwing all the money at him.  He signed up and told Cubs fans what they were longing to hear:  We Are Going to Suck.


Soon to be modified slightly…

And suck they did.  Boy howdy.  Theo decided to trade any and every player on the roster that had any semblance of immediate value to a team that knew were not going to be part of an eventual young core.  The result?  Multiple seasons of 60-70 wins with a team the Bad News Bears could take down in a 7 game series.  But Wait!  There’s More!  The pleasant benefit of being that bad is consistently drafting high in the following year’s draft.

2013 – 61 wins the previous season nets them Express Men Model and hitting machine Kris Bryant.

2014 – 66 wins gives them 3rd place Chris Farley impersonator and baseball clubber Kyle Schwarber.

You might recognize those names as key cogs of the current Cubs machine and guess what?  They are young and don’t cost stupid money (see Heyward, Jason)

Then 2015 comes.  Bryant and former Red Sox cast off Anthony Rizzo are joined by Red Sox champion Jon Lester and blaze into the playoffs with 97 wins and somehow have to play a Wild Card play in game on the road.  They do and go on to get to the NLCS, only to be swept by the NY Mets (Apu Nahasapeemapetalon’s favorite team).

And then the 2016 Cubs-Stomp-on-every-MLB-team-lovefest happens and what did my White Sox do?  GLAD YOU ASKED.



Yeah, so all that.  Which leads me to why this is actually a good thing for the White Sox.  And that is any and all goodwill created by the Sox winning the World Series in 2005 is null and void.  It still happened (yes, SportsCenter… I see you) and they can’t take away the memories of that October.  But it’s officially been wiped from the collective sports memory at large.  This Cubs thing is real, like climate change.  I tried to ignore it (kidding, I believe in CC, but you get what I mean) but its no longer just talk.  It’s happening happened.  And now the White Sox are right back where they were for 88 years prior to 2005.  Invisible.  They are John C. Reilly’s Mr. Cellophane.  If the Sox win a game, is there truly anyone there to see it?

So what now?  Basically, this will should force the Sox to choose one of two paths:

A) Tear the team down to the studs (of which there are very few).  Trade every worthwhile player (Chris Sale, Jose Quintana, any veteran making more than the minimum salary) for the best deals possible.  Lose as many games as possible and pray the amateur scouts can find the top notch prospects to build a new core (like a certain blue clad team I remember).

B)  Go all in and actually spend big money wisely (again, not this organization’s strong suit) while keeping your ridiculously affordable core of great pitching talent.  And not getting washed up pros 5 years too late, actual talent that has many years of prime performance ahead of them.

Because this stuff as currently constructed is broked.  Humpty Dumpty style.  In the NBA, they’d call it NBA Hell (teams that are not good enough like the Cavs or Warriors, but not terrible enough to get high draft picks like the Knicks or Kings)  Being mediocre is the worst feeling as a sports fan because ultimately, nothing can be gained from it.  And with a rapidly dwindling share of the Chicagoland sports market, the Sox cannot afford to go another 5,10,20,50 years being overlooked and marginalized.  Pick a lane and commit to it.

Ok, that ends my catharsis.  I don’t expect Rick Hahn or Kenny Williams to read this, but if you do guys…just know that I do not envy you all sitting on that stage at SoxFest 2017 as Bob from Bridgeport lays into youse guys for letting the Cubs set up a reign of dominance in this city for years to come.


My Brother and My Cubs fan Father, during happier times…

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365 Days Later…

And now for your annual Chicago Gore Post!

It has been literally a whole calendar year since my last entry and that is… I don’t even know what word to use.  

  • Incredible?
  • Sad?
  • Impressive?
  • Depressing?

I’ll let you (you did stay around waiting for another post didn’t you?) decide on that. But for now I think it’s best to recap what’s happened since the last time the Earth was in the same space in orbit of the Sun. 

  • I left off with my wife 8 months pregnant and I’m extremely happy to announce that we had a baby boy!  His name is Thomas and he most definitely inherited his mother’s button nose.   
  • Unfortunately he had to stay in the NICU for 3 more days before we could take him home!   
  • Halloween came a few months later and a Navy Captain chose the wrong time to step into our “Turn You Back to a Baby” Machine.   
  • A dress went viral on the Internet. My poor poor wife insists its Black and Blue.  Clearly, for sane people, it’s White and Gold.   
  • I got a new job!  Still working for the State of Illinois in IDES but now I’m an Administrative Assistant working downtown instead of trekking 40-50 miles back and forth to the burbs!   
  • Easter came and my son crushed it.   
  • Travelled to Milwaukee. Consumed beer. Baby sick. New teeth. Little sleep.       

And that’s about it!  Ok, so I’m a bit biased… I’m completely and absolutely in love with my now 9 month old son and he’s kind of a big deal.  

Sorry I didn’t post much but I will try (ha!) to post a wee bit more frequently than once a year!

See ya!  


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