Writing 101, Day One: Unlock the Mind

(note: tastefully copied from the post put directly on The Daily Post’s site, which was not evidently the “right thing to do”.  Now back to your regularly scheduled blog)

Aw hell, enough with the excuses why I haven’t written in forever.  Lets just do this shall we?  I’m going to take part in Writing 101, the June posting thingy on The Daily Post.

Here’s the Day One assignment:

To get started, let’s loosen up. Let’s unlock the mind. Today, take twenty minutes to free write. And don’t think about what you’ll write. Just write.

Ok, I’m free writing.  It’s kinda freeing (ha!) how this feels honestly.  I don’t have to worry about picking a topic to write on… I don’t have to worry about it being interesting, or funny, or topical, or dumb, or worry about the approval I deperately seek… Wait, why am I so desparate (or is it desperate?) for attention when I write?  I mean… i guess i’ve answered my own question right?  Why else do we write?  We are selfish…so damn selfish.  I just need… I dunno… validation that there’s something more to this (sometimes) hum drum existence.  I feel alone in my thoughts.  I want them to get out. I want them to be read and to be enjoyed and I want to create something real!

Speaking of which, I have literally created something real in the sense that I have created a real life human being.  Well, its there in the oven still.  My wife’s 7 months pregnant now with out first child and that was a doozy in itself to do… See me and my wife went thru infertility problems.  You know, how there’s some people who just get pregnant without even really trying?!  Yeah… that didn’t happen for us.  It’s like, quality control for the human race I guess.  Randomness/chaos rules.  Some of us reproduce like goddamn rabbits, some of us get born with lazy swimmers and tubes that aren’t exactly spotless. 

some do.  Some don’t.  And that’s just how the cookie crumbles right?  So we took about 2 years or so… seeing doctors, having procedures, getting shot with needles, taking cocktails of pills that even Whitney Houston would raise an eyebrow at.  Not sure why I took the sideswipe there on Whitney… but hey, crack is whack right?  Anyway, spent about a year spinning our wheels before we met this awesome fertility doctor who… through his magic wand and a couple of implantations was able to do what your intrepid blogger couldn’t.  And I couldn’t be more grateful. 

By the way, technically the day she was “impregnated” impregnated (oops, no quotes necessary, that is actually right)  was FRIDAY The 13th!  SO once our child becomes the next Bill Gates/Barack Obama/Jimmy Smits/etc. and cures cancer/ends world hunger/creates a decent movie vehicle for the talent that is Jimmy Smits/etc.  we’ll finally be able to end the nonsense surround that superstitious day!  Yah!

Ummmm, oh right, what’s next?  I like this whole stream of consciousness thing, I’m just typing what hits my brain and then my fingers decide to hit the right keys in the right order and BOOM!  wORDS!  sTUFF!  i FORGOT TO TURN OFF THE CAPS LOCK!!! ok, there we go.  hmmm… how much time is left?  tick tock tick tock… Ok, i think my time is up… break time is done.  Time to go make the donuts and let the public have their way with me.  Peace out and don’t let the door…yeah bye.

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